I want to say that I spent it alone, but that’s not true because I spent it with my girls, enjoying a curry.

And while this was my choice it doesn’t always feel like it was my choice to make, more like a choice that happened to me. Not that that makes sense from the outside.

In order for me to stay with my family I would have had to sleep in my wheelchair, and that is just something I did not want to do.

So you could say I chose not to spend the night with my family, or you could say I chose to be comfortable. It just frustrates me that I had to choose one over the other.

It seems my choice will always be my own comfort or the comfort of those around me. It feels like I will never be in a situation where it will be possible for all of us to be comfortable. And I’m always the one expected to make the sacrifice. I chose not to make that sacrifice tonight and my reward for holding to my word is being away from my family.

It’s not that I blame my family for this just that I wish the world was more accessible to me so that these choices didn’t have to be made. Or maybe it is that I blame my family and I just don’t want to recognize it. I honestly don’t know.