Tag: Cerebral Palsy

Oh that’s a question

On By Katy DalyIn Blog, Writing PromptsLeave a comment

If you won two free plane tickets, where would you go?

I’ve always wondered if I were to ever win a competition where something like this is offered what would practically happen? Just because I won a trip like this doesn’t mean it would be accessible to me.

Are used to think about answering those competitions where you could win a car. I always wondered if I’d be able to sell the car if I want it because I knew it wouldn’t be a prize that would have any value to me.

But let’s just assume this holiday would be completely accessible, like it would be for any non-disabled person that won it.

Vegas probably.

Or somewhere warm at least.

Where would you go?

Working for free on benefits

On By Katy DalyIn Blog, My Disability TruthLeave a comment

Image if your worked stopped paying you as soon as you earned what someone else decided was enough for you to live on.

You then had to live off your savings until someone else decided that you didn’t have enough money to live on so you should be paid again.

All the while you were still working.

This is the reality for many disabled people.

While if you’re lucky you’re on one of the few disability benefits that aren’t means tested, most are.

Benefits are the only source of income some disabled people have. Even if they are able to work, despite there conditions and the ableism they face in society. They still need the benefits to pay for the disability tax. The increased cost of living in society as a disabled person.

And yet if you what someone else seems is too much money, most if not all of your income is taken from you.

I can’t really travel.

On By Katy DalyIn Blog, My Disability Truth6 Comments

What are your future travel plans?

Yes for the reasons you’re thinking of, but also not really for those reasons.

Let’s just say that money can solve most problems and if you really don’t believe that then you’re not paying attention to how privileged financially you are. Money could definitely solve the problem with travel for me. While much of the world is inaccessible, many of those inaccessibilities can be overcome with money.

Money the world does not want me to have because it does not want me to make a living for myself and have to see people like me in the real world. Money the world does not want me to have because I would not confirm to the useless disabled person they believe I should be. Money they’re able to keep from me.

Society wants me to be poor, and so I cannot travel. It is that simple.

That said, I would love to go to Vegas.

I know I said I was going to write much and I think I’m still going to keep this short and sweet but this one was to good not to answer

When I tell you I forget I’m disabled.

On By Katy DalyIn My Disability Truth5 Comments
Image Description: Screenshot from a Tumblr post from un-monstre, the text reads: Disability will have you thinking shit like ” I’m not even that disabled. I can manage as long as I limit myself to very specific careers, never go shopping for more than an hour or two at a time, Keep my plans open so I can cancel and stay in if need be, I’m only going out a few nights per week at the most.”

When you look at it like that. It’s kind of sad.

Wheelchairs do not move sideways.

On By Katy DalyIn My Disability TruthLeave a comment

See underneath all images for Image Description all credit to the original content creator.

Frame 1
Frame 2
Frame 3
Frame 4

COMIC STRIP
A Day in the Life of a PWD (Person With a Disability)

Frame 1:
A wheelchair user is traveling down a sidewalk. A man and woman are walking towards her.

Frame 2:
As the wheelchair user approaches, the man steps to the side but the woman doesn’t.

Frame 3:
The woman almost walks into the wheelchair user, and is startled.
WOMAN: Oops…I didn’t see you there!

Frame 4:
They all continue on their ways.
WHEELCHAIR USER (thinking):
What am I? Invisible?!

Backdated post. I’m making a half hearted attempt to keep this blog sort of going, and keep my streak.

If you say it, you should mean it.

On By Katy DalyIn Blog6 Comments

So floating around on the disability areas of social media today has been a question to the effect of “What is your worst experience of exclusion?”, so I figured for todays post I will answer that again here.

For me my worst experiences of exclusion are failed promises of inclusion. Now I know sometimes this can be more difficult to accomplish, but more than once it’s been easier and they’ve still failed. The part you have to really understand is whether I should or not, I don’t expect to be included in things. The truth is, exclusion is and probably always will be, my norm. I don’t expect an invite to the party. So why dangle the invite in front of me, if you have no intention of putting the work in?

Seriously, why are you doing that to me? To anyone?

If you genionely want to put in the work to include someone with a disability in something, then put in the work. I really don’t think this is to much to ask. And if it genuinely falls through, after you tried, then tell us. Don’t just ignore us, and think we forgot.

From experience, when you’re not used to the invite and you finally get it, it’s not something you’re going to forget. In fact you are probably going to hold on to it more than others, you will not forget. I certainly did not. I really looked forward to going to this party, and they said they’d find a way for me to be included, and then they just didn’t. I don’t even know if the party happened, I presuming that it did, because why wouldn’t it? But the basically just cut me off and stopped mentioning it. I honestly don’t know why.

Just tell disabled people the truth. We deserve that at least.

So go on then, if you find yourself reading this and you feel like answering – What is your worst experience of exclusion?”

How much is to much?

On By Katy DalyIn My Disability Truth1 Comment

It depends who you ask I suppose.

But it seems like the act of mentioning issues more than once is to much for some people on the internet. So much that they have to blindly threaten me on the internet, just because they don’t like the issues I’m talking about.

It’s almost like the issues I share on my social media are persistent problems, that aren’t just going to disappear because I post about them once. Funny that, isn’t it? What really gets me is that I would also be criticised for sharing issues that were only a one off, but sharing and resharing issues is just to much.

Societal problems are persistent, and if you think people aren’t complaining about anything important, you should just be glad that they’re not problems you have to deal with. That for now, the issues are distant enough, to be something that you see strangers talking about on the internet.

One day the silly little problems will be your problems. Disability is a matter of if, not when. It will be you one day. You should really care about disability issues, because one day they will effect you. But even if that isn’t enough of a reason, you can just leave the people you don’t agree with alone. If you don’t like it, scroll.

Anyway, to the person that left that comment, thank you. You not only made me laugh, but gave me content both for my other social media platforms as well as this blog.

Going out

On By Katy DalyIn BlogLeave a comment

So I’ve been invited to a family event and thankfully the place is fairly accessible. I’m quite happy with the gap in the bench at the table, and the ramps, but to be honest that’s about it. I can’t get myself a drink though, which is probably both equally a blessing and a curse.

Its still odd for me to be invited to things, I’m honestly not sure I’ll get used to it. Before coming here I contemplated not coming multiple times, I figured it would just be easier for everyone else and for me. But I’m glad I came, I think.

One day maybe I can go somewhere with people and not feel anxious that I’ll get in the way. Living in an inaccessible society, causes lasting emotional damage. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to being invited anywhere, to being wanted.

Even the friends I see regularly, I’m still surprised they want me around, but somehow they do. That the problems I cause are worth it for them.

Logically I know it’s not my fault that society is so inaccessible, but emotionally? It’s a struggle to remember that I am not the issue. That I deserve to be involved in things even if it’s difficult.

It’s okay to not feel like you belong, it’s not your fault. Just try not to let that stop you from doing something you want to. You deserve to have fun.

Oh the weather outside is… Sunny?

On By Katy DalyIn Blog2 Comments

Okay, so I know it’s not Christmas, but I couldn’t resist titling this post that way. It’s not actually a very positive post, well it sort of is, but this makes me feel even better about it.

So today I went to see some family, and I had to stay in the garden. Surprisingly, for where I live the weather was okay, but that doesn’t mean I was very happy about the whole experience. Obviously would’ve been worse. Had the weather been bad, but either way it’s uncomfortable for me to go to places where all I can do is wait outside.

The reality of most housing not being accessible to you, is more than the fact that you are often limited in the housing you can live in. For me I will likely never leave my current home, it was very difficult for me to find somewhere that’s even partially accessible. But also that you often cannot visit anyone in there, homes because you cannot get into them.

There is almost no one out of all my friends and family that I am able to go and see due to the accessibility of the house that they live in. And if I’m being honest with myself, this is something that I find really upsetting.

Logically I know it’s too much to say that I wish they would only live in accessible housing, but also, I wish they would live in accessible housing. I wish that it wasn’t too much to ask to want to be part of my family.

It gets really frustrating when you are the one that has to make the compromises in order to spend time with family, and I am yet to find a way round it. Having them come to my home is also difficult because it means I have to get my home ready for visitors. This is something that I’m not able to do, and don’t worry about the way that anyone visited my home judge me for that. For this reason, I don’t have a lot of people visiting my home and that is honestly the way I like it.

Another part of the reason that I don’t like having people over in my home is because I have a lot of strangers in my home regularly, in the form of carers. It makes me not like the experience of having other people in my home if I’m honest, whether I know them or not.

For this reason, it was strongly suggested that we meet somewhere else in order to spend time together. Mainly because given where I live there is every chance that it might rain, and I didn’t want to have to get wet, as I can’t easily change. Though in this instance that didn’t happen thankfully, it was still a risk, and not one I was very comfortable in taking but needs must.

From experience if I don’t take risks such as going to people’s inaccessible homes in order to spend time with them. Or going to events at just about accessible venues, which are still inaccessible as far as I’m concerned, then I’m often blamed. In the past it feels as if others believe I have chosen not to participate in the get together. Rather than it being the venue and the lack of planning on the organises part, that are the reason I’m unable to attend.

As a result of this happening repeatedly, I haven’t internalised this as being something wrong with me. As if it is my fault, I am not able to spend time with friends and family and therefore I must compromise when I can in order to do so.

Today, as I have said, it went well but it doesn’t always. And I have to admit I’m left wondering when others will compromise to spend time with me? Honestly I know the answer is never, as non-disabled don’t find themselves in a position where there need to compromise in the way that disabled people do.

But it would be even better if more homes could be accessible and I would I simply be able to go and see those that I care about in their homes.

More homes need to be accessible to disable people. So that we get to be part of society and our families properly.

Please forgive me if this one doesn’t make a lot of sense I can’t really figure out why but I don’t feel like it does. I hope you get the gist of it anyway.

I swear my incontinence and disability are just spiteful.

On By Katy DalyIn My Disability TruthLeave a comment

Minutes after my carers left this morning I did something I have never done before, which accidentally caused my catheter to become unclamped soaking me in pee. But this had to happen on a day where I am going out tonight so have cancelled my evening call. This means that even though I have Febrezed my clothes, thank you mum for that little trick, I will technically have to be wearing damp clothes for something close to 18 hours.

It had to happen today didn’t it?

I just feel like what could already turn out to be a rubbish day, I’ve got concert tickets but not accessible ones, so they may just turn me away. Has had the worst start that it possible could.

This is why I almost always wear black. It’s not a fashion choice really, but something that hides the fact that things like this happen.

I hate it. All of this. It makes me feel like a child, and I kind of just want to cry about it and go back to bed. But I can’t do that as nothing can really be done about any of this. So if I decide to give up I’ll just be ruining the day for everyone else. So I’ve just got to pretend this didn’t happen, smile and move on.

Today already feels like to much, and I’ve not even been awake an hour.