I don’t think non-disabled people realise how much choice they get in the world. They get more choice in where they live, work, in almost everything they do than I will ever get.

Now I understand that there are other factors at play here to make choices in life, money and social status, to give two. But being disabled will always make the world inaccessible in one way or another, will always result in less choices being available.

If I had the money to buy a house, the cost of an accessible house or of making a house accessible to me, would be more than it would ever be for a non-disabled person. If I was not disabled, I would certainly have the experience necessary to go alongside the qualifications that I already have in order to get the job I want.

While I face the same barriers as I non-disabled person in the world, I also face the additional barrier of inaccessibility of ableism, that effects everything around me. Sometimes it feels like there is not a single decision I can make in my life that is not impacted by me being disabled. This can be difficult for me to deal with something, it can lead and often does lead me to feeling like I am not in control of my life for short periods of time. Like I don’t have a choice in anything I do.

This can make it difficult for me to watch non-disabled people turn down choices and decisions that they have in the world that I will never get. Choice is often inaccessible to me.

The world is simply more accessible to those who are not disabled.

Logically I know it’s not fair to say that they should take all the opportunities that they have, because many people will never get the opportunity to say no. I know that they deserve to live the life the way they want to, and absolutely should do that, without the position that other people are in hanging over them. This is why I would of course never say anything to anyone in person, it is not up to me to influence the choices they make because of my lack of choice. Especially because they are not responsible for the lack of choice that I have in the world. But emotionally this can be difficult for me to do with.

None of this means that I am not happy for them, the choices they make or where their life is going. It just might mean that I find it hard to express this alongside the other emotions I find myself dealing with. So just keep this in mind if you tell a friend about something new in your life and they don’t react the way you thought they would. Your progression in the world may be difficult for them.